“Stop it,” I snap out testily.
“Quoi,” MB is trying to be innocent but is laughing so hard that he can barely get his one word response out.
“I see what you’re doing,” I say, waving my finger at him. He mimics the gesture back at me with exaggeration, totally cracking himself up.
“What am I doing,” he asks, flailing his arms about wildly.
I press my lips together in a tight line and sigh loudly while looking plaintively at our friends.
“You see what I have to put up with,” I ask them, while outlining his form with my hands. My life is very hard and wearisome.
“I’m just trying to learn your language,” he responds, grinning, while creating even more gestures.
I turn back to our friends and give a “voila!” type hand wave towards MB’s direction.
He just starts laughing even harder.
So yes, there is it, I will admit it, I am a hand-talker*. It is virtually impossible for me to carry on a conversation without accompanying gestures to bring emphasis to what I am saying (in fact, I am gesturing in my mind right now as I type this…yes, that is so possible). I just get so excited when I talk about things that the words themselves just don’t seem like enough. Anyway, everyone loves a pantomime, right? RIGHT?!
Well, Jerry Lewis does at any rate.
MB loves to tease me about this and makes jokes about how he needs to translate my language but here’s the deal, at the end of the day, he already knows it.
The importance of spoken language cannot be debated; it is crucial to basic communication and one’s ability to ask for what they want or to communicate complicated information.
For instance, years ago on a trip to China I watched a friend try to order a soft-serve ice-cream at a fast-food restaurant (yes, yes, FINE, we were at a KFC in China…it had been a long trip, we just wanted something that tasted like home. Don’t worry, we were punished for being such philistines about an hour or so after the fated meal). My friend did not speak or read any Chinese and walked up to the counter as the rest of us watched from our seats. We had all taken the easy meal deal that was photographed so that we could just point to it but she was determined…soft-serve ice-cream happiness would be hers!
As she stood at the counter, we watched, both amused and horrified (mainly amused, we may not have been the nicest group ever), as she brought her fisted hand to her mouth and made several circular motions before making continued in and out movements.
I’m not sure if I’ve described this correctly but just think about it for a moment…
“Ehrmergerd! She totally just made a super inappropriate sexual gesture…soft-serve ice-cream has never been so dirty!”
We were practically falling out of our chairs as the cashiers did their best to stifle their laughter and procure her pornographic ice-cream. This was a situation where more of the spoken language, as opposed to gesturing, would have come in handy, I mean, no one wants to go Jenna Jameson in a KFC.
However, I have also noticed over the years that there are a variety of situations in which spoken language isn’t necessary.
It is possible to communicate emotions with nothing more than our facial features and commonness as human beings (um…except maybe like the Iceman). Regardless of culture or language there are some things that are just funny or just sad. We’ve all shared laughs with strangers over something that we both watched happen and I have often had an encouraging smile from someone across a room on a tough day. How does that person know that I am sad? I haven’t said anything, I haven’t spoken to them but they inherently understand something that I am communicating and, perhaps more incredibly, are able to communicate back to me in total silence.
Excitement can be shared without speaking as well. I remember watching, amused as my Father and MB’s Uncle, neither of whom spoke the other’s language, shared an animated discussion about the wines they were drinking. I mean, how is it possible to have an in-depth discussion about palette and wine quality while speaking in two completely different languages? Somehow, it is.
As humans, we have been given a unique style of communication**, one that allows us to communicate and share the strongest and most important information…happiness, sadness, joy…whether we share a spoken language or not. It is an inherent gift that we have been given so that, even in a strange land, we need never be truly alone.
“Oh please,” I say to MB. “You do it too, we all do it!”
MB grabs his chest in protest, “I do not, I hardly use my hands at all when I speak.”
I give him a rather drole facial expression, scanning the use of his hand against his chest. He drops it quickly before beginning to explain how he doesn’t really use his hands to express himself.
My friends and I exchange looks, a silent joke shared, regarding his hand movements as he speaks.
I guess actions truly can speak louder than words.
*It is a trait that I come by honestly, as my Mother is, perhaps, the most epic hand-gesturer ever to be born outside of Italy. You could potentially create an entire dictionary from her gestures.
** So unique, in fact, that dogs have actually evolved in order to understand it. If you are a dog lover and haven’t seen this Nova documentary, check it out: http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/nova/nature/dogs-decoded.html
*** P.S. Pop on over to Bread is Pain Food and check out the latest post…unless you don’t like fried mozzarella (read: hate joy).